Wednesday, October 27, 2021

A Retelling of our Origin Story

Me, Wilbert, and Thrina

With the impending release of our 2006 debut album on Digital Music Streaming apps this coming October 29, 2021, I think it is just fitting for me to recall and share our humble beginnings, our journey, and how our band Thoughts And Notions was formed and conceptualized. What I'm about to write is the first time that I would be sharing a more in depth story of my personal journey in forming our band Thoughts And Notions. For starters, here's a fun fact: Thoughts And Notions is actually named from the acronym of the surname (TAN) of the founders of the band. 

My Beginnings

I've always been a fan of music. But I have no talent or have no gift when it comes to playing any musical instruments or even having a good voice for singing. I however love writing. Articles, Essays, Poems. I have an extensive experience when it comes to writing. Since my High School days, I was a writer for our school paper. In college, at Xavier University Ateneo de Cagayan de Oro, I was part of the Crusader Publication writing sports articles. In between my High School and College education, I probably won a couple of essay writing contest if I could remember. In our Church org, I used to be the Editor-in-Chief of our quarterly newsletter which was released all over the Philippines in various Regional chapters. Online, I've done contributions for Superman Homepage, one of the biggest Superman Fan sites around. And also with Philmusic, the premiere Online Music site in the Philippines back in the day. In fact, part of my bucket list is to be able to write a book one of these days. But honestly, I don't think this amounts to anything because it's not paid work, or I never won any journalistic award. But I do enjoy writing, grammatical errors and all. I also used to lead our Church's Youth Ministry, maybe not because of qualifications, but because there was no other choice. But I did diligently gave it my best. Controversies and all. Which would also land me the role as the Singles Ministry Head when I graduated from college. So basically, in my formative years, I was burdened with the task of being a good example to the members. So I guess, I always had to walk the tight rope to live my life not only as an "image" of what a good Christian is, but to really embrace that responsibility and actually live it entirely. I guess by worldly standards, you could say I lived a boring life. But I was always informed by my Christian Faith. And I was naive to think that nothing could hurt me as long as I live an upright life informed by my Christian Faith. Until I experienced my first heartbreak (we all do at some point right?). It broke me so bad to the point I thought everything (being the best possible way I could be as a Christian) was not worth it. That maybe being a good Christian, there's no guarantee of God's promise that everything will always be right. In short, my Christian Faith was shaken.   

The Old Sage    

I've known Wilbert Tan since my high school days. We were in the same Christian youth spiritual formation retreat. He's a bit older than me though. He always has been inclined to music and had that unexplored talent back in the day. Over the years he honed it by forming various bands in Cagayan de Oro, from varied musical genres as extreme as Progressive Rock to R&B and anything in between. I could probably say that in our city, when it comes to music, his name is legendary. In fact, he launched a lot of CDO musicians' career by virtue of being his student or by taking him in as a band member. I could not count my fingers how many musicians in CDO and even in Manila who were able to release albums of their own with Wilbert as part of their band. I have always been a HUGE fan of his work (I think I almost own a complete catalogue to most of his recordings). But more than that, he has been this rock that I always gravitate towards specially when I'm dealing with problems in our Church group. So when I was dealt with my first heartbreak, I approached him. But before that, one of the things that I did in trying to soothe the pain was to listen to some angry music. I mean since I began leading our Church Ministry in the youth and singles group, I've always tried to control my emotions. I remember I always accepted the blows and the blame for every failure. Which is fair because of command responsibility. So with this setback, rather than expressing my anger and depression, I turned to listening to EMINEM's angry music. If you were a fan of music back in the 2000s, you'll know who I'm referring to. I allowed Eminem to curse and be angry for me. Until all the anger were drained from my soul. From Eminem, I switched to Dashboard Confessional. Because Emo Music was so big back then. And there were some songs that Dashboard Confessional sang that I could relate so much to. And with that, I had an idea. Since I've been writing some gut wrenching poetry because of my heartbreak, why not turn them into lyrics and have Wilbert arrange the music. Just my way of finally ridding myself of this heartbreak. I guess to help me out, Wilbert acquiesced to my request. So I thought, lets make EMO Music, I'll try the singing part (even if my voice sounded like William Hung, that guy from American Idol). We did wrote and recorded one song (though at that point I was never seriously thinking of releasing the song or starting a band), with me doing the worse vocal work I've ever heard in Cagayan de Oro (CDO). So after that experience, he put his foot down. He told me, why not write songs that would help "uplift wounded souls."    

FCCY Music Ministry       

Wilbert had long been a part of our Church's music ministry. While I served as a brief Praise and Worship leader pinch hitting for our main worship leader during his absences (like I said a while ago, I was always the spare tire haha!). I think I'm just not comfortable going on stage to sing (well because I do sound like William Hung when singing). And I think I'm too much a distraction because I remember some of the youth kids attending the Praise and Worship events exclaiming to me that when I lead the Praise and Worship events, they are reminded of Bamboo or Rico Blanco with the way I sing and move on stage (I'm a huge fan of both as I told it here). I'm just not cut out as a worship leader. The good thing though is, we have a choir who could really sing. And one of them was Cathrina Tan Dimaano (now married to an Escano). Thrina was this unassuming 15 year old kid who felt a little uneasy with her peers at that time because she was a new member of our Church's Youth Group. But I took her under my wing at that time as she was one of the ever supportive and active members of our Youth Group. So when Wilbert suggested to me that I write lyrics that would help "uplift wounded souls", I put myself in a situation where I have to acknowledge God's Love as the most sincerest and powerful form of love above all else. So the real healing began to whatever hurt I was feeling. Rather than let Eminem or Dashboard Confessional speak to me about these emotions, I turned to God and allowed him to speak to me. And from those Prayers and Conversations with God, I would jot down some of my learnings or some of the messages that God would speak to me. In effect, using it as an inspiration and instrument in writing lyrics that would help "uplift wounded souls." This experience was a very important part of my healing process. And with that realization, I was "In Awe of His Amazing Love." I shared my lyrics to Wilbert, and he told me that this was so much better. Filled with so much inspiration and a renewed hope for a better tomorrow. It made me think, why not record and share this to our Church? It might help. At that time, there were preparations for a National Church Youth Event to be hosted by our city's youth group. And they were sourcing funds to help fund the event. So I decided to push through with the recording and donate the sales proceeds to our Church's youth group. But I couldn't do it without having someone who could sing our songs. Wilbert and I are not gifted singers. That's where Thrina came into the picture.           

The self produced CD that we sold and donated to our Church's youth group

The Recording Process

Being an old reliable of our music ministry, I approached Thrina if she would be interested in recording an album full of songs with the intention of donating the sales proceeds to our Church's youth group (which she also belongs to at that time). Gladly, she was in on the project, and thus began our recording process. At that time, Thrina was still 15 years of age, so being a student with academic responsibilities, she also had to sacrifice a portion of her evenings to do the vocal tracks. We were running on a condensed timeline. Because we wanted to finish the recording of the album, just in time for our youth group to start their fund raising activities. I am forever grateful to Thrina's parents Tito Ric and Tita Chreselda for supporting us with this project. Also at that time, Wilbert was also recording songs for his other band, Drizzle, so he was basically emptying his musical knowledge between two differing genres of music. I wrote ten lyrics basing on my road to healing and other stuffs I wanted to share as I conversed with God. Thrina, as inexperienced as she was, bravely supplied the vocal tracks to the best of her 15 year young ability to the ten songs that we wrote. I could still remember that during the last few songs, Wilbert was on a songwriting rut and was running empty on his inventory of musical knowledge. But thank God we were able to finish the album on time. I think God was our George Martin to the Beatles. We wouldn't be able to finish the album on time if God did not give us the extra push needed to finish it. Then came the album artwork. Since none of us were proficient with graphic design, I snapped up a photo image that my brother Dennis randomly experimented on his new camera phone. It might not look artistically good, but for me there was a meaning behind the photo that I would call "A Light in the Darkness" that suits our songs very well. We were able to finish the CD production just in time for our Church's Youth group's fund raising project. We handed around 200 CD's to the current Youth Ministry head at that time, Perry Kwan, as our donation with all the sales proceeds going to the Youth Ministry's funding for their event. And with that, our songs were spread within the confines of our Church and other Regional Chapters of our youth group. Then we got the early reviews. Some were encouraging us to send a demo to Praise Music, Philippines' largest distributor of Christian Music.

Things Just Got Bigger      

So I approached a House of Praise kiosk in one of the malls here in CDO and asked for a contact number or where I could send a demo of our CD album which I named "In Awe of His Amazing Love." Since we came from a far flung city in Mindanao, I had to mail a copy of our album to Praise Music which was located in the Philippine capital of Metro Manila. It did not take that long for Praise Music to respond. Their A&R at that time, Mr. Al Torres, asked me to come to their office in Manila to finalize the distribution agreement and sign the contracts. So I hurriedly booked a flight to Manila and visited their office. He told me that the song "My Love Song" caught his attention (we will be launching this song as our carrier single when our album comes out on Spotify). After the contracts were signed, he told me that we (Thrina and me) should start forming a band. So that we could promote our album once it would be released nationwide. Which left me in a dilemma because at that time Wilbert was already based in Manila with his other band Drizzle. So I went home filled with opportunity and also a sense of dread that we might not be able to fulfill our obligation to promote the album because we don't have a band (I will be writing about forming the band in another blog entry as I feel this entry seems to be long already). After all, there was really no plan in having this album to go beyond our Church. This was just for a fund raising project. And on a more personal note, it was just my way of coping up with what I was going through at that time. But even back then, I could firmly say that everything was already out of our hands the moment we poured our hearts into this project. God took it from our hands. He planned for something bigger. Something we did not know at that time while we were producing the album. All those blood, sweat, and tears were just part of the sacrifices that needed to be done for God to work his grace. Picture this, we were just a bunch of amateurs when we started this project. I was never a prolific lyricist (while I do acknowledge most of what I wrote for the album was under God's guiding hand). Wilbert was a burgeoning sound engineer that although he could write songs, mixing them in a professional way was out of the question. He was still learning. Thrina was just a 15 year old kid that I think probably didn't know what she was going into except that she would be singing songs to honor God and be the voice in sharing his amazing love in our Church ONLY. We were situated in the far flung city of Mindanao where opportunity when it comes to having their music distributed on a national level was scarce. I think at that time in 2006, to the best of my knowledge, there were only two CDO based bands who were able to release an album on a national level. Nuncyspungen and Tabularaza if I am not mistaken. Imagine that feat. Crazy right? But not by God's grace and his plan. He literally took our album and brought it outside our city for it to be heard on a national level. 

Praise Music produced CD

In Awe of His Amazing Love NOW!         

As mentioned above, there were too many instances where I could probably say that God do works in mysterious ways. And fifteen years since our first album was released, we are on the brink of releasing them again on a much larger scope. If 15 years ago, releasing an album and be heard was limited to someone actually procuring a CD copy or be played in radio stations. Now, listening to music is as simple as accessing your favorite songs on Digital Music streaming apps like Spotify. I did went on a 12 year hiatus in this songwriting endeavor with the band. And like our beginnings that I just shared here, God continued to nudge me to go this path once more. You can check out the inside story of our come back here. So 15 years apart from 2006, our debut album In Awe of His Amazing Love is making a come back on Digital streaming apps all over the world. As per our digital music distributor, our songs will be accessible in over 240 countries and will be uploaded over 20 Digital Music stores and apps. Here in the Philippines, it will be hosted by eight Digital music streaming Apps (due to region restrictions for some digital streaming apps). As I'm writing this, I'm experiencing goosebumps. The thought of our journey many years ago to where we are now is something truly so extraordinary that you could only credit it all to God's plan and his grace. 

Because in Wilbert's own words and I quote:

"A Labor of Love, and a leap of faith, to say the least. The songs here were recorded some15-odd years ago using a cheap shure knockoff with a flour strainer serving as pop filter mixed and mastered by a bunch of amateurs using cool edit pro DAW (adobe audition's great great grandfather), none of us thought this album would go beyond CDO's city limits. But lo and behold, it went places. Now it is being given new life as it is soon to appear in many of our favorite streaming service."

This is our amazing journey. Our humble beginnings. And this wouldn't have been possible without the instrumental support of the people below:

1.) Lolita Tan- Wilbert's Mom who has been patient with us making a mess of their home during our recording sessions.

2.) Mr and Mrs. Ric Dimaano- Thrina's parents who trusted me and Wilbert in tagging along Thrina with this little project that we started. Tina too, Thrina's sister who was instrumental in critiquing some of my lyrics. For my further improvement and correction. 

3.) My Parents, Mr. and Mrs. Benjamin Tan- who were actually my financiers in the production of the album and the purchase of additional recording equipments that I have long entrusted and eventually gave to Wilbert. 

4.) San Lorenzo Filipino-Chinese Catholic Community- Who were instrumental in providing the seeds to our Spiritual growth and helping us nurture them.

5.) Christopher Tan and Christine Liong- Two of my confidants when it comes to nurturing my Christian Faith and helping me weather the storms of my spiritual journey.

6.) Perry Kwan and Amon Ching- Our Church's Youth and Young Adult Spiritual formation heads at that time. Who were gracious to accept our donations for our efforts to help raise funds for our Church.

7.) Michael Soyongco, Alexis Ramirez, Angeli Ramirez, and the rest of the Music Ministry- For working and collaborating with us during the initial months practicing and honing our crafts.

8.) Mr. Johnny Sy, Al Torres, and the rest of Praise Music- They paved the way for our songs to be shared on a national level across their hundreds of stalls in the Malls as well as various record bars. 

9.) Various CDO Radio Stations- 103.3 The New J (Christian Radio Station in CDO), 89.3 Killer Bee (now Magic), Sandy 101.5, 92.3 Wild FM, Yes FM, Love Radio. These secular radio stations played our songs even with our songs' genre (Christian Contemporary Music) that might not appeal to the general public. They trusted us that much!

10.) Iking Ranises- CDO based band Tabularaza main man, singer, songwriter, for embracing us and welcoming us to CDO's music community.

11.) Budit dela Cruz- On/Off productions main man who were instrumental in providing opportunities for us to share our music in the underground music community.  

12.) Maedeleine Tebontu-Chua- She listened to my Dashboard Confessionals.

13.) Various Churches from across different Christian denominations- For inviting us in their Church musical events. Which proved to us that Christians from various churches can come together to honor and give praise to God.

13.) And lastly, to various random people who have become a part of our journey, the band members (they will be introduced in my future blog entries) specially those who bought and supported our albums. I'm sad that I lost contact to most of them when we took a hiatus and the closing of our old Multiply social media site. There were a lot of them who truly lifted our spirits in times when we were about to give up.

In closing, the songs from our band Thoughts And Notions has always been about the experiential side of the journey of our Christian Faith. It isn't preachy in nature. But it is an honest attestation of how God's amazing LOVE saved us. How this became our guiding principle that totally altered the course of our life.    

Our debut album will be released on Friday, October 29, 2021. You can Pre-order or Pre-save our songs in the link below. Hope you'll join us in this next amazing journey in the Digital world!











https://bfan.link/in-awe-of-his-amazing-love  

God is GOOD ALL THE TIME! This is for HIS greater GLORY!

YouTube Album (free music stream no apps needed)

Thursday, October 14, 2021

Reposting an old article from Cagayan de Oro

Found an old article about the humble beginnings of the band. Thought I might share it here. Still sifting my E-mails to recall our past stories as we are prepping for the album's Digital Release. read all about it here.


The first iteration of the band.


Thoughts And Notions:
CDO's Newest Pop-Rock band

 

Met this young and energetic band that fashions themselves as one of CDO's upcoming bands. I first heard about them when they guested at Killer Bee’s Local Vocal show and it totally caught my attention. At first I thought it was just like your other run of the mill regular bands that belts out songs about love, brokenness, and others. So at first I just ignored them as another one of those bands who are trying to make a good break in the local music scene. But when I was able to listen to their songs, (especially their live set on local vocal), I was totally caught stunned. This band got some real talent. And it surprised me to know that they had already released an album under Praise Music, and it was released nationwide. I listened to their songs and was quite impressed with their originals. These guys indeed aren't like your regular run of the mill bands. When I digested the lyrics, I realized they are singing something extraordinary. They are a band with a mission. Exceptional! Why? Because their songs talks about their faith (Jars Of Clay, or Switchfoot anyone?). So I got curious and tried to reach someone from the band by accessing their Friendster Blog. I managed to come into contact with Jasper Lloyd Tan, the band's chief Lyricist. Talking to this guy amazed me. I've never met someone so passionate about their music and their faith such as him. "You know, I am such a huge fan of Christian contemporary music. And I'm a bit saddened why here in the Philippines we don't have someone like them." he intimated with me. So that's the reason why he decided to start one. I for one will not deny that when we start talking about any religious music, we have these stereotypes about them. How we always put them in a box as boring. But the arrival of bands such as Jars Of Clay, Switchfoot, and MercyMe (I even heard their songs being played on Killer Bee) is starting to create ripples all over the world. So I thought to myself, maybe it's about time the Philippines would have their counterparts to them. And luckily for us Kagayanons, Thoughts And Notions decided to be just that, Christian Contemporary artists. "Aren't you afraid to be labeled as that? And put in a box as a Christian Contemporary Band only?" I queried. "Well it's the risk that we have to take… but I beg to differ." He shot back.. "If you were able to watch the Bamboo concert where we played as one of the guests, you didn't exclusively hear Christian themes from our songs. In fact 3 out of 4 songs that was played were standard Pop-Rock songs that dealt with Teen-angst and such the likes, but still it was positive. It was only our carrier single My Love Song which had Christian undertones." He added. "So you mean to say that from this album that you'll be releasing under Praise Music, there will be songs that doesn't have Christian Undertones?" I asked him. "Actually majority of the album are, it has that theme. But the new members of the band wrote the 3 songs that were played during the Bamboo show. And we are intending to include it in the next album" he replied. He let me listened to the whole album later on and I'm quite convinced that it may have some Christian undertones, but it's still something that can be appreciated universally. The love that they are singing about can still be applied to any person. The succeeding conversations would then center on the band's history. How their original intention was to form an emo band, only to scratch the project in favor of another. How they recorded and sold their albums independently and would donate part of their sales to the church that they belong to. And how they were lucky (or blessed to be exact) to be able to land a distribution deal with Praise Music. How they auditioned new members of the group to formally form their band. I then was amazed by their story. 


Originally it was Wilbert Tan, Jasper Lloyd Tan, and Cathrina Dimaano who were the founding members. Wilbert (of Drizzle fame, and a legendary CDO Rock band named Oblivion) collaborated with Jasper in this project, who then brought along Cathrina as their Vocalist. Wilbert composed all of the music that is contained on the first album while Jasper wrote the lyrics. When breaks came pouring in (i.e. the distribution deal with Praise) and Wilbert moving on to Manila with his main band Drizzle. Jasper and Thrina went on a frantic spree auditioning potential band members. There were a couple of duds. Clash of ideas were experienced. But they luckily found a good group who used to call themselves as Sadhana. One member of the band goes to the same church with Thrina and Jasper, so it was easier for them to connect on their ideas. The band auditioned and passed with flying colors. Thus John Fernandez, Tim Marquez, Alvin Carreon, and Jun2x Dychauco finalized their line up. "These guys have a lot of talent!" Jasper shared to this writer. They're bringing along their music to Thoughts And Notions and they're forming quite a formidable team. Jasper related that the arrival of the new members would bring balance to his songs, which centers more on his Christian Faith. They would like to create and write music that would bring positive insights to the listeners. Their driving force will not be like your typical Rock Stars (i.e. Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll), but it would be about their faith. And maybe it would be a good motivational factor as well as inspiration in order to have a staying power in this ever-changing music industry. But Thoughts and Notions will not be put in a box as exclusively Christian. Jasper will make sure of that. It's one thing that he will not allow. "Actually sometimes it got me thinking that maybe we'll be in a no win situation." Jasper exclaimed. "For the ultra conservative Christians, I'm sure our music will be called as noise, while the mainstream listeners might call us too Christian. But we choose to have Faith." He added. "If I'm not mistaken the Philippines never had a Christian band, or maybe there was but was never truly embraced, but there's no harm in trying." He finishes. All the band wants to say is give their music a chance, and they certainly will not disappoint you. And this writer can attest to that. Their music is something so fresh and amazingly uplifting. Would you ever expect Christian songs sounding edgy and deliciously Pop-Rock? I could even do some little head banging and foot tapping while listening to the songs. And it even helped me lift up my dormant spirits and helped me remember the things that I missed with my Christian Faith. Hey Listening to these types of songs are actually cool! So I came into a realization that listening to more songs about angst cannot heal my pains and brokenness. It's about time we bring some great inspiration to our lives! This writer sincerely hopes that Thoughts And Notions can make us Kagayanons proud. And if they can start a revolution in the local music scene, it would be nice to know that a Kagayanon and a Mindanaoan has made it so. Mabuhi ang Talento sa Kagayanon ug sa mga taga Mindanao!  

 



Thoughts And Notions: In Awe of His Amazing Love is out now in all Praise Music outlets and selected Record bars nationwide. Grab a copy now! They will be having their album launching At SM CDO on May 7, 2006 4pm.



P.S. 

As I was reading this article in the present, it somehow made me remember that Bamboo Gig where we messed up big time. If you guys could remember that scene from the Tom Hanks movie "That Thing You Do!"? Where the band The Wonders played their first major concert and made a mess onstage while playing to a large crowd? Yup! It really looked like that! On our first major appearance!


2021 UPDATE: Attaching the link to where you could listen/download our debut album in your favorite digital streaming apps. don't forget to follow our Facebook Band Page and Twitter Account too! As well as our YouTube Channel.

Listen to our songs here:




Follow and Like our Facebook Band Page


Follow us on Twitter:


YouTube Channel:


Pre-Save Thoughts And Notions In Awe of His Amazing Love NOW!

 



Pre-save our debut digital release of our 2006 debut album 

Thoughts And Notions: In Awe of His Amazing Love 

Now on your favorite digital music streaming platforms and stores. 

We can't wait to share our songs to the next generation of listeners.   

Tuesday, October 12, 2021

The Power of a Song

Before I started our band Thoughts And Notions, I was nothing but a big fan of Rivermaya Music. I mean, I never imagined I'd be writing songs and recording it with a band. But Rivermaya was really a big influence on me. I've been a fan of Rivermaya since the beginning. Though I didn't really immediately knew of their existence until I heard the song 214. Back then, I was snobbish when it comes to OPM music. Eraserheads was already big back then, but their music did not appeal to me. I was more into boybands like Boyzone (HEY! Who wasn't?). So there was this one summer drive with my cousin that I could still vividly remember and on his car radio was the first album of Rivermaya. As the music played, I was suddenly surprised when 214 played on the speakers alongside their Filipino songs in the album. I exclaimed to him, "So 214 is actually a song written and recorded by Filipino artists?" Thus began my Rivermaya fandom. From that moment, I have never missed buying a Rivermaya Album. Albums after albums initially on Casette Tapes. And from the old casette tapes that I own, I upgraded into the CD format when the album FREE was released exclusively on CDs. I sang to the tunes of their songs with my High-School friends, sometimes even role-playing as the Rivermaya band members themselves. I even got my Rivermaya Atomic Bomb album confiscated by my mom when she heard me blurt out a line that sounded inappropriate to her (but luckily, I managed to recover the album by switching it with TEETH's album, the one with the song Laklak). So from Bamboo (the band's first vocalist) to their transition to Rico Blanco as the vocalist, to their various iterations and line up changes, and down to even up to now I remained a Rivermaya Fan. But there was one Rivermaya song that will forever be etched in my memory and became a song that totally changed my life. And no, it wasn't 214. It was this song...

Umaaraw, Umuulan

Hindi mo maintindihan
Kung ba't ikaw ang napapagtripan
Ng halik ng kamalasan
Ginapang mong marahan ang hagdanan
Para lamang makidlatan
Sa kaitaas-taasan, ngunit

Kaibigan huwag kang magpapasindak
Kaibigan easy lang sa iyak


Dahil wala ring mangyayari
Tayo'y walang mapapala
Huwag mong pigilan ang pagbuhos ng ulan
May panahon para maging hari
May panahon para madapa
Dahil ang buhay natin ay sadyang ganyan

Umaaraw, umuulan
Umaaraw, umuulan
Ang buhay ay sadyang ganyan

Umaaraw, umuulan


'Wag kang maawa sa iyong sarili
Isipin na wala ka nang silbi
Isang dambuhalang kalokohan
Bukas sisikat din muli ang araw
Ngunit para lang sa may tiyagang
Maghintay...

Kaya't kaibigan
Huwag kang magpapatalo
Kaibigan itaas ang noo


Dahil wala ring mangyayari
Tayo'y walang mapapala
Huwag mong pigilan ang pagbuhos ng ulan
May panahon para maging hari
May panahon para madapa
Dahil ang buhay natin ay sadyang ganyan

Umaaraw, umuulan
Umaaraw, umuulan
Ang buhay ay sadyang ganyan
Umaaraw, umuulan


Dahil wala ring mangyayari
Tayo'y walang mapapala
Huwag mong pigilan ang pagbuhos ng ulan
May panahon para maging hari
May panahon para madapa
Dahil ang buhay natin ay sadyang ganyan

Umaaraw, umuulan
Umaaraw, umuulan
Ang buhay ay sadyang ganyan
Umaaraw, umuulan...

Yes! Umaaraw, Umuulan changed the trajectory of my life. You see, in that year that the Rivermaya album "Tuloy ang Ligaya" was released. With the aforementioned song as the carrier single, I faced a tragedy. I was in the last year of my college education and was ready to graduate and was eager to look forward outside the confines of student life. But tragedy strucked when my parents were gunned down by unknown assailants. Thank God they did not die and was miraculously saved when my father managed to shield a fast speeding bullet aimed at his head by using his forearm to block the bullet, hence shattering his arm bones. My mother was hit in her thigh and leg, shattering her bones. This tragedy caused them to be incapacitated for more than a year. Thus, I had to quit school and take over the family business. My family operated two grocery stores at that time, with one store I managed as a working student. While I have an ample experience in store operations, I however was inexperienced with financial management. My father controls that part of the business. So I took over in managing both stores with my brothers who were still in high school helping me out every now and then. But it became such a huge burden for me specially when suppliers/creditors started to doubt my capability to manage the finances and operate the stores. Some were even pulling out their support, not extending credit, afraid that I might not be able to manage the finances well and leave unpaid debts owed to them. Whispers and chatters were aplenty that our business was bound to fail with an inexperienced manager managing the business.     

Amidst all of these troubles, I clang to that one song that kept on blaring on my speakers. "Umaaraw, Umuulan" taught me to be strong. It taught me that while life is full of ups and downs, we should never give up and just soldier on and be strong enough to survive the tides crashing on our way. Because somewhere along the bend, there's a better future ahead of us. Or these troubles are just temporary. The song became like my de facto cheering squad. For every tear that I shed, this song egged me to push forward. For the times that I really wanted to give up, the song told me to hold on and not wallow in self pity and defeat. This was the power of a song that seems to hit you out of nowhere but stays in your consciousness. And the power of the song lifted me from tragedy and transformed me to become a better and stronger version of myself. Yes I lost my college years, I never had any social life in college. I never fully experienced and enjoyed how it was to be so young, so free, with no worries but to enjoy the company of your "barkadas." That was the exchange. And it was so tough for me. But well, I survived. And that's the most important thing I guess. I learned the ropes of the business early. I was wet behind the ears at that point, but the hasty growth and tough as nails decisions I had to make back then made me wiser beyond my age. But my story does not end there. Here's another funny thing.

You see, before that tragedy happened, I recently made a promise to God that I would go back to our Church community and re immerse myself with Church community work. If I was not mistaken, it was just the day before that tragedy happened. I used to be so active with Church community work, but I had a falling out with Church elders, which caused me to take a sabbatical and mended my wounds. So when I made that promise to God and then that tragedy happening just the next day, I could not believe my fortune that God had forsaken me just when I had promised to him that I'd be back serving him thru the church. Honestly it crossed my mind that God failed me, or he had forsaken me, but I immediately erased that thought the moment it crossed my mind. I should still feel blessed and thankful that my parents survived. But I guess it was only fair to question God after the promise I made to him. Or maybe not. But that Rivermaya song, coupled by my promise to God probably played a big part with how I managed to survive my ordeal. Imagine if I gave up and was not able to handle all those problems and burdens? I don't know where I would be now. But looking back, it was indeed a miracle. That God's saving grace put me in a position to face an insurmountable challenge and eventually triumph over it. Yes it wasn't like the skies opened and a light rained down on me with his thunderous voice comforting me or egging me on not to give up. It took "Umaaraw, Umuulan", a Rivermaya song, to become God's instrument and voice in speaking to me. It took the power of that one little song that some of you might not even have heard to save me from my predicament. 

That's why years after years of dealing my tragedies and imperfections. It dawned upon me that maybe if I can write and record songs, maybe it would mean to someone in some way. We don't need to win awards, or get streamed by millions. All we need is that one soul whom our songs could reach out the way Rivermaya's song reached out to me (to this day I still get goosebumps whenever I hear this song). Then I would be happy to be God's instrument to pass it on the way Rivermaya has to me. And that's why Thoughts And Notions exists. Our songs might mean to someone in ways we never imagined or would know.

And I thank Mark Escueta of Rivermaya for being the bridge to get our songs to be streamed on digital streaming platforms soon. Friends, I'm inviting you to like our band page to know more about our songs 

https://www.facebook.com/Thoughts-And-Notions-193302864060157        

Thank you for hearing my story out. Keep fighting! "Umaaraw, Umuulan.... ang buhay ay sadyang ganyan!" 

Here's the song in its entirety. Enjoy!


And the Rivermaya Playlist I made on Spotify (plus my band's song inspired by Rivermaya)