Thoughts And Notions Official Blogsite: A Retelling of our Origin Story

Me, Wilbert, and Thrina

With the impending release of our 2006 debut album on Digital Music Streaming apps this coming October 29, 2021, I think it is just fitting for me to recall and share our humble beginnings, our journey, and how our band Thoughts And Notions was formed and conceptualized. What I'm about to write is the first time that I would be sharing a more in depth story of my personal journey in forming our band Thoughts And Notions. For starters, here's a fun fact: Thoughts And Notions is actually named from the acronym of the surname (TAN) of the founders of the band.

My Beginnings

I've always been a fan of music. But I have no talent or have no gift when it comes to playing any musical instruments or even having a good voice for singing. I however love writing. Articles, Essays, Poems. I have an extensive experience when it comes to writing. Since my High School days, I was a writer for our school paper. In college, at Xavier University Ateneo de Cagayan de Oro, I was part of the Crusader Publication writing sports articles. In between my High School and College education, I probably won a couple of essay writing contest if I could remember. In our Church org, I used to be the Editor-in-Chief of our quarterly newsletter which was released all over the Philippines in various Regional chapters. Online, I've done contributions for Superman Homepage, one of the biggest Superman Fan sites around. And also with Philmusic, the premiere Online Music site in the Philippines back in the day. In fact, part of my bucket list is to be able to write a book one of these days. But honestly, I don't think this amounts to anything because it's not paid work, or I never won any journalistic award. But I do enjoy writing, grammatical errors and all. I also used to lead our Church's Youth Ministry, maybe not because of qualifications, but because there was no other choice. But I did diligently gave it my best. Controversies and all. Which would also land me the role as the Singles Ministry Head when I graduated from college. So basically, in my formative years, I was burdened with the task of being a good example to the members. So I guess, I always had to walk the tight rope to live my life not only as an "image" of what a good Christian is, but to really embrace that responsibility and actually live it entirely. I guess by worldly standards, you could say I lived a boring life. But I was always informed by my Christian Faith. And I was naive to think that nothing could hurt me as long as I live an upright life informed by my Christian Faith. Until I experienced my first heartbreak (we all do at some point right?). It broke me so bad to the point I thought everything (being the best possible way I could be as a Christian) was not worth it. That maybe being a good Christian, there's no guarantee of God's promise that everything will always be right. In short, my Christian Faith was shaken.

The Old Sage

I've known Wilbert Tan since my high school days. We were in the same Christian youth spiritual formation retreat. He's a bit older than me though. He always has been inclined to music and had that unexplored talent back in the day. Over the years he honed it by forming various bands in Cagayan de Oro, from varied musical genres as extreme as Progressive Rock to R&B and anything in between. I could probably say that in our city, when it comes to music, his name is legendary. In fact, he launched a lot of CDO musicians' career by virtue of being his student or by taking him in as a band member. I could not count my fingers how many musicians in CDO and even in Manila who were able to release albums of their own with Wilbert as part of their band. I have always been a HUGE fan of his work (I think I almost own a complete catalogue to most of his recordings). But more than that, he has been this rock that I always gravitate towards specially when I'm dealing with problems in our Church group. So when I was dealt with my first heartbreak, I approached him. But before that, one of the things that I did in trying to soothe the pain was to listen to some angry music. I mean since I began leading our Church Ministry in the youth and singles group, I've always tried to control my emotions. I remember I always accepted the blows and the blame for every failure. Which is fair because of command responsibility. So with this setback, rather than expressing my anger and depression, I turned to listening to EMINEM's angry music. If you were a fan of music back in the 2000s, you'll know who I'm referring to. I allowed Eminem to curse and be angry for me. Until all the anger were drained from my soul. From Eminem, I switched to Dashboard Confessional. Because Emo Music was so big back then. And there were some songs that Dashboard Confessional sang that I could relate so much to. And with that, I had an idea. Since I've been writing some gut wrenching poetry because of my heartbreak, why not turn them into lyrics and have Wilbert arrange the music. Just my way of finally ridding myself of this heartbreak. I guess to help me out, Wilbert acquiesced to my request. So I thought, lets make EMO Music, I'll try the singing part (even if my voice sounded like William Hung, that guy from American Idol). We did wrote and recorded one song (though at that point I was never seriously thinking of releasing the song or starting a band), with me doing the worse vocal work I've ever heard in Cagayan de Oro (CDO). So after that experience, he put his foot down. He told me, why not write songs that would help "uplift wounded souls."

FCCY Music Ministry

Wilbert had long been a part of our Church's music ministry. While I served as a brief Praise and Worship leader pinch hitting for our main worship leader during his absences (like I said a while ago, I was always the spare tire haha!). I think I'm just not comfortable going on stage to sing (well because I do sound like William Hung when singing). And I think I'm too much a distraction because I remember some of the youth kids attending the Praise and Worship events exclaiming to me that when I lead the Praise and Worship events, they are reminded of Bamboo or Rico Blanco with the way I sing and move on stage (I'm a huge fan of both as I told it here). I'm just not cut out as a worship leader. The good thing though is, we have a choir who could really sing. And one of them was Cathrina Tan Dimaano (now married to an Escano). Thrina was this unassuming 15 year old kid who felt a little uneasy with her peers at that time because she was a new member of our Church's Youth Group. But I took her under my wing at that time as she was one of the ever supportive and active members of our Youth Group. So when Wilbert suggested to me that I write lyrics that would help "uplift wounded souls", I put myself in a situation where I have to acknowledge God's Love as the most sincerest and powerful form of love above all else. So the real healing began to whatever hurt I was feeling. Rather than let Eminem or Dashboard Confessional speak to me about these emotions, I turned to God and allowed him to speak to me. And from those Prayers and Conversations with God, I would jot down some of my learnings or some of the messages that God would speak to me. In effect, using it as an inspiration and instrument in writing lyrics that would help "uplift wounded souls." This experience was a very important part of my healing process. And with that realization, I was "In Awe of His Amazing Love." I shared my lyrics to Wilbert, and he told me that this was so much better. Filled with so much inspiration and a renewed hope for a better tomorrow. It made me think, why not record and share this to our Church? It might help. At that time, there were preparations for a National Church Youth Event to be hosted by our city's youth group. And they were sourcing funds to help fund the event. So I decided to push through with the recording and donate the sales proceeds to our Church's youth group. But I couldn't do it without having someone who could sing our songs. Wilbert and I are not gifted singers. That's where Thrina came into the picture.

The self produced CD that we sold and donated to our Church's youth group

The Recording Process

Being an old reliable of our music ministry, I approached Thrina if she would be interested in recording an album full of songs with the intention of donating the sales proceeds to our Church's youth group (which she also belongs to at that time). Gladly, she was in on the project, and thus began our recording process. At that time, Thrina was still 15 years of age, so being a student with academic responsibilities, she also had to sacrifice a portion of her evenings to do the vocal tracks. We were running on a condensed timeline. Because we wanted to finish the recording of the album, just in time for our youth group to start their fund raising activities. I am forever grateful to Thrina's parents Tito Ric and Tita Chreselda for supporting us with this project. Also at that time, Wilbert was also recording songs for his other band, Drizzle, so he was basically emptying his musical knowledge between two differing genres of music. I wrote ten lyrics basing on my road to healing and other stuffs I wanted to share as I conversed with God. Thrina, as inexperienced as she was, bravely supplied the vocal tracks to the best of her 15 year young ability to the ten songs that we wrote. I could still remember that during the last few songs, Wilbert was on a songwriting rut and was running empty on his inventory of musical knowledge. But thank God we were able to finish the album on time. I think God was our George Martin to the Beatles. We wouldn't be able to finish the album on time if God did not give us the extra push needed to finish it. Then came the album artwork. Since none of us were proficient with graphic design, I snapped up a photo image that my brother Dennis randomly experimented on his new camera phone. It might not look artistically good, but for me there was a meaning behind the photo that I would call "A Light in the Darkness" that suits our songs very well. We were able to finish the CD production just in time for our Church's Youth group's fund raising project. We handed around 200 CD's to the current Youth Ministry head at that time, Perry Kwan, as our donation with all the sales proceeds going to the Youth Ministry's funding for their event. And with that, our songs were spread within the confines of our Church and other Regional Chapters of our youth group. Then we got the early reviews. Some were encouraging us to send a demo to Praise Music, Philippines' largest distributor of Christian Music.

Things Just Got Bigger

So I approached a House of Praise kiosk in one of the malls here in CDO and asked for a contact number or where I could send a demo of our CD album which I named "In Awe of His Amazing Love." Since we came from a far flung city in Mindanao, I had to mail a copy of our album to Praise Music which was located in the Philippine capital of Metro Manila. It did not take that long for Praise Music to respond. Their A&R at that time, Mr. Al Torres, asked me to come to their office in Manila to finalize the distribution agreement and sign the contracts. So I hurriedly booked a flight to Manila and visited their office. He told me that the song "My Love Song" caught his attention (we will be launching this song as our carrier single when our album comes out on Spotify). After the contracts were signed, he told me that we (Thrina and me) should start forming a band. So that we could promote our album once it would be released nationwide. Which left me in a dilemma because at that time Wilbert was already based in Manila with his other band Drizzle. So I went home filled with opportunity and also a sense of dread that we might not be able to fulfill our obligation to promote the album because we don't have a band (I will be writing about forming the band in another blog entry as I feel this entry seems to be long already). After all, there was really no plan in having this album to go beyond our Church. This was just for a fund raising project. And on a more personal note, it was just my way of coping up with what I was going through at that time. But even back then, I could firmly say that everything was already out of our hands the moment we poured our hearts into this project. God took it from our hands. He planned for something bigger. Something we did not know at that time while we were producing the album. All those blood, sweat, and tears were just part of the sacrifices that needed to be done for God to work his grace. Picture this, we were just a bunch of amateurs when we started this project. I was never a prolific lyricist (while I do acknowledge most of what I wrote for the album was under God's guiding hand). Wilbert was a burgeoning sound engineer that although he could write songs, mixing them in a professional way was out of the question. He was still learning. Thrina was just a 15 year old kid that I think probably didn't know what she was going into except that she would be singing songs to honor God and be the voice in sharing his amazing love in our Church ONLY. We were situated in the far flung city of Mindanao where opportunity when it comes to having their music distributed on a national level was scarce. I think at that time in 2006, to the best of my knowledge, there were only two CDO based bands who were able to release an album on a national level. Nuncyspungen and Tabularaza if I am not mistaken. Imagine that feat. Crazy right? But not by God's grace and his plan. He literally took our album and brought it outside our city for it to be heard on a national level.

Praise Music produced CD

In Awe of His Amazing Love NOW!

As mentioned above, there were too many instances where I could probably say that God do works in mysterious ways. And fifteen years since our first album was released, we are on the brink of releasing them again on a much larger scope. If 15 years ago, releasing an album and be heard was limited to someone actually procuring a CD copy or be played in radio stations. Now, listening to music is as simple as accessing your favorite songs on Digital Music streaming apps like Spotify. I did went on a 12 year hiatus in this songwriting endeavor with the band. And like our beginnings that I just shared here, God continued to nudge me to go this path once more. You can check out the inside story of our come back here. So 15 years apart from 2006, our debut album In Awe of His Amazing Love is making a come back on Digital streaming apps all over the world. As per our digital music distributor, our songs will be accessible in over 240 countries and will be uploaded over 20 Digital Music stores and apps. Here in the Philippines, it will be hosted by eight Digital music streaming Apps (due to region restrictions for some digital streaming apps). As I'm writing this, I'm experiencing goosebumps. The thought of our journey many years ago to where we are now is something truly so extraordinary that you could only credit it all to God's plan and his grace.

Because in Wilbert's own words and I quote:

"A Labor of Love, and a leap of faith, to say the least. The songs here were recorded some15-odd years ago using a cheap shure knockoff with a flour strainer serving as pop filter mixed and mastered by a bunch of amateurs using cool edit pro DAW (adobe audition's great great grandfather), none of us thought this album would go beyond CDO's city limits. But lo and behold, it went places. Now it is being given new life as it is soon to appear in many of our favorite streaming service."

This is our amazing journey. Our humble beginnings. And this wouldn't have been possible without the instrumental support of the people below:

1.) Lolita Tan- Wilbert's Mom who has been patient with us making a mess of their home during our recording sessions.

2.) Mr and Mrs. Ric Dimaano- Thrina's parents who trusted me and Wilbert in tagging along Thrina with this little project that we started. Tina too, Thrina's sister who was instrumental in critiquing some of my lyrics. For my further improvement and correction.

3.) My Parents, Mr. and Mrs. Benjamin Tan- who were actually my financiers in the production of the album and the purchase of additional recording equipments that I have long entrusted and eventually gave to Wilbert.

4.) San Lorenzo Filipino-Chinese Catholic Community- Who were instrumental in providing the seeds to our Spiritual growth and helping us nurture them.

5.) Christopher Tan and Christine Liong- Two of my confidants when it comes to nurturing my Christian Faith and helping me weather the storms of my spiritual journey.

6.) Perry Kwan and Amon Ching- Our Church's Youth and Young Adult Spiritual formation heads at that time. Who were gracious to accept our donations for our efforts to help raise funds for our Church.

7.) Michael Soyongco, Alexis Ramirez, Angeli Ramirez, and the rest of the Music Ministry- For working and collaborating with us during the initial months practicing and honing our crafts.

8.) Mr. Johnny Sy, Al Torres, and the rest of Praise Music- They paved the way for our songs to be shared on a national level across their hundreds of stalls in the Malls as well as various record bars.

9.) Various CDO Radio Stations- 103.3 The New J (Christian Radio Station in CDO), 89.3 Killer Bee (now Magic), Sandy 101.5, 92.3 Wild FM, Yes FM, Love Radio. These secular radio stations played our songs even with our songs' genre (Christian Contemporary Music) that might not appeal to the general public. They trusted us that much!

10.) Iking Ranises- CDO based band Tabularaza main man, singer, songwriter, for embracing us and welcoming us to CDO's music community.

11.) Budit dela Cruz- On/Off productions main man who were instrumental in providing opportunities for us to share our music in the underground music community.

12.) Maedeleine Tebontu-Chua- She listened to my Dashboard Confessionals.

13.) Various Churches from across different Christian denominations- For inviting us in their Church musical events. Which proved to us that Christians from various churches can come together to honor and give praise to God.

13.) And lastly, to various random people who have become a part of our journey, the band members (they will be introduced in my future blog entries) specially those who bought and supported our albums. I'm sad that I lost contact to most of them when we took a hiatus and the closing of our old Multiply social media site. There were a lot of them who truly lifted our spirits in times when we were about to give up.

In closing, the songs from our band Thoughts And Notions has always been about the experiential side of the journey of our Christian Faith. It isn't preachy in nature. But it is an honest attestation of how God's amazing LOVE saved us. How this became our guiding principle that totally altered the course of our life.

Our debut album will be released on Friday, October 29, 2021. You can Pre-order or Pre-save our songs in the link below. Hope you'll join us in this next amazing journey in the Digital world!